                                             So, you wanna play in the MUD?
                                                     Written and kept up by
                                                                  Turtle
                                                    Cash and VISA accepted

This is a list of the Frequently Asked Questions of the Discworld MUD. This
should save you a lot of time and frustration when playing the game. You
should read the entire thing through before playing the game, because there
is a lot info and this will save you tons of time.


Q: Where the hell am I? What's going on?
A: Calm down. Take a deep breath. Feel better? Good. Okay, now we can talk.
You are in a role playing game based on the series of books called the
Discworld written by Terry Pratchett. This game is put together by people
who: a) like the books and/or b) like to creates challenges for other people.


Q: That's all great. Really. But back to my original question. Where am I?
A: Well, you start out in a bar called the Mended Drum. This is where all
the newbies (first time players) begin. You will notice a board that
contains various thoughts of the players here. You can read that to get the
overall feel of the place. This is a pretty loose place, and no one takes
anything too seriously.


Q: Where do I go first? Is there a beginner area?
A: There is no specific beginners area. The city where you start in
Ankh-Morpok, is the closest thing, though it does have it's dangerous
sections. Those are for the most part clearly marked.


Q: So what am I supposed to do?
A: Well, if you look at the bottom of the room description, you'll see that
there is something that tells you the obvious exits. Note the word obvious.
You can go in a direction by typing s for south, n for north and so on. Try
heading south.


Q: Now what smart guy?
A: Keep going. Explore a little. See if you can get a picture of the game in
your head. This is all up to your imagination, so if you can't see it there,
this is going to be a little tricky. While you are doing this, you may want
to make a map for yourself. Sure, they sell them, but the best way to get it
burnt into your brain is to make one yourself. After that, you don't really
need it.


Q: Okay, I walked around, got a little lost and I'd like to do something
more serious now. What do I do?
A: There are various professions you can pick from: fighter, thief, priest,
wizard, and assaaissaaaiaian (never did learn how to stop spelling that).
There may be one or two others, but those are a little tricky to get to, in
that they may not exist yet. You have to find the guild of the one that you
want to join and go there. There is a room in each where you will be allowed
to join the guild. Be warned: you can only join once per character. Be sure
it's what you like.


Q: How do I know what's best for me?
A: What am I? A mindreader? Do you want to steal crap, be death from above,
forward the cause of your god, command the mysteries of the universe, or
strap on a sword and kill stuff? That's how you figure out what to do.


Q: What is the best guild?
A: That's a toughie. Each one has it's good points and weak points.

Fighters - Basic, no nonsense killing machines. Good for people that don't
really care about getting too deep into the role. Nice and simple. Problem
is that you don't get any really cool stuff the higher you go. It stays basic.

Thieves - These guys have tricks everywhere. Hiding, stealing, picking
locks. The problem is that they also have a quota that they have to steal
each week. This is a popular profession.

Assissaiiasiis screw it - As a killing type person, you get to become an
artist of inhuming(killing things, in an artful kind of way). This is also
popular in that the guild just opened and people are flocking to it. A good
things about assassins is they get skills / commands which are a cross
between fighters and thieves. Plus they get to inhume people. However,
assassins must do the run, which can seriously reduce your lives and they
*all* become player killers. Its not really for the first timer or the
moron. Oh, and you get to wear a lot of black.

Priests - As a priest, you have a few choices. You pick a god and then get
rituals the most noted of which is healing. The problem is that you lose a
little killing power as well as you have to stay in the alignment of your
god. Sort of a balancing act. If you can do it, the rewards are pretty good.

Wizards - The toughest class. In the beginning, they can't fight, and they
can't cast spells very well. They just sit there and fume a lot, feeling
bitter. Hell, getting spells means going into the Library, which is a
horrible experience if you don't have a map. Ask anyone. However, a high
level wizard is one of the toughest people around. The spells do things in a
flash (literally) that other players have to struggle through. It's not for
those that don't have a lot, and I mean a lot, of patience. Join this guild
with that in mind.


Q: Okay, I joined a guild. What's the next step?
A: Type the word "help". This will give you a list of all the commands
available to you as a player. There are a few others that you can get help
on later, as you get more skills. Go through the list one by one so that you
can get a feel for it. This may take you a while.


Q: How should I rearrange my stats?
A: Everyone has different rules for how they set up their stats through the
command Rearrange. Here's a list of what they are for:

Strength - Determines how much stuff you can carry. Important for fighters.

Dexterity - This is how well you can dodge stuff, hit people and how much
stuff you can carry before dropping things. Good for thieves and
assaasnasnaasn  . . . people that kill professionally.

Constitution - Sets your hit points. The higher, the more you can get.

Wisdom - Useful for priests who use it to cast prayers.

Intelligence - Useful for wizards who will be casting spells.

How you do it is up to you, and no matter how you do it, you will find out
later that you would have preferred another combination. Ask people in the
profession that you want to go into what they think is best. Ask them why.
After getting a few reasons, make the plunge.


Q: I've joined and I need cash.
A: There are lots of ways to make money. The best way for a beginner is to
walk around, collect the stuff lying on the ground and sell it. DO NOT try
to kill things. At this point, you can't even kill the rats. And when you
think of equipping stuff that you find, remember, no one else picked it up
for a reason. It's crap. With a few rare exceptions.


Q:  What is experience and why do I want it?
A: When you do certain things, you get experience points (or xp for short).
When you join a guild, you can go to a special room in your guild and
advance your skills, which help you fight/steal/cast/pray better. The more
xp you spend, the better you get at something.


Q: Is there a sex skill?
A: *slap*


Q: What the f*** did you hit me for?
A: Because you show a remarkable lack of manners. Cursing is discouraged
just because in a place where everything is made of words, you should know
how to be more expressive. If you have trouble with that, study that
dictionary a little more. The better you spell and write, the more high
class you appear to be, but don't worry, no one is expecting perfection or
Shakesspear.


Q: You spelled that wrong.
A: *silence*


Q: Where do I go for experience?
A: There are two ways to get experience. The first is to kill things. The
second is to complete quests. Quests are a set of things that you have to
do. Once completed, you are rewarded with all kinds of stuff, depending on
the quest. Some give you experience points only. Others cash, weapons,
special items, a magical bonus or two to your stats. Some are easy, some are
exceedingly tough. 


Q: Any tips for fighting people?
A: Turn the command "Monitor" on. You can type "help monitor" for more
detail. Don't' let the hp get too low. You get xp for a combination of
things: who you kill, how you kill them, how much damage you take, if you
leave in the middle of a fight and come back later. The same person could be
worth 300 xp or 7000xp.


Q: How do I find a quest?
A: If you ask an established player this, some will be nice and give you a
tip. Others will ignore you. You're not supposed to give out information.
Quests are what make the game a challenge. Otherwise, all you would do is
walk around and kill stuff. Actually, that does have a certain appeal . . .
. Quests can usually be found by searching an area thoroughly, keeping in
mind the obvious exits thing. A good place for a beginner to start is the
river. There's an easy one there. The rest you just gotta find. It requires
a little brainpower.


Q: I searched around and got myself killed. I am now a distant cousin of
Casper. Am I stuck like this?
A: Nope. Go to Small Gods Street and find the entrance to the temple of
small gods. Go one south, two west, up twice and one east and you'll enter a
room with Harry. He'll give you a new body. Watch it though, you only have
seven lives. Maybe.


Q: Maybe?
A: Take a hint.


Q: How do I know who is a player and who is part of the game?
A; Type finger, or who, and you will be given a list of the people playing
at that moment. It changes pretty rapidly. Some times there are three or
four people playing, other times thirty.


Q: Why does it take my commands so long to do sometimes?
A: That is called the lag. This game is played over the Internet and there
are lots of things to drag it down. Think about keeping thirty people
playing the same game all at once. It's gonna be slow sometimes.


Q: How do I make friends?
A: When you enter a square with someone, say something witty, like "Hi."
Lots of people are willing to help a newbie. You should be nice to people.
This is a social experience as well as a gaming one. Those are real people
on the other ends of the terminals. Just because it's a computer screen
doesn't give you a reason to be a jerk. Also type "help inform" The inform
command lets you know when people come and go on the Disc.


Q: How do I do that cool stuff like make my person sneeze and laugh and stuff?
A: Those are called "soul" commands. Type "help soul" for a very lengthy
complete list.


Q: Should I attack other players?
A: Only if you really like those special times with Harry. Most players will
beat the living stuffing out of you. It's generally considered anti-social
and you need help to get anywhere. Trust me.


Q: Why did Carrot arrest me?
A: Good question. Who knows? He gets in that kind of mood sometimes.


Q: Can I kill Carrot?
A: *uncontrollable laughter*


Q: How long am I in jail?
A: Go get a drink and take a break. 15 minutes or so, real time. You have to
let your person sit there until you get let out , or bailed for 25 dollars.
There's a couple other ways, but not for newbies.


Q: So when will I lose the annoying title, newbie?
A: When you stop asking questions like that.


Q: Who's in charge of this place?
A: Type finger and in the list you'll see that a few names have a "C" or a
"H" or "I" or something next to them. 
C = Creator attached to Domains.
I = Independent (Creator) not attached to specific domain.
L = Lord in charge of the Creators of a domain and attached to that domain.
H = In charge of Lords and General Admin sometimes attached to Domains.
Liaison Domain cre's are there to Liaise with and help the players in
general... to find out who's in Liaison just type "finger liaison" These are
the Creators, High Lords and so on that run the place. You can ask then
about stuff, but for general questions, use the newbie channel. It's best
not to really bother them unless you have a good reason. Knowwuddimean?


Q: What about when I get sick of the city?
A: First, make sure that you visit a few places. Some of note are: the
Patrician's Office, the Post Office, the Drum, and the T-Shop(good luck
*snicker*). They are central locations for doing things like mail and
getting information. After that, there are a few gates that will let you out
to the countryside where a whole world of challenges await. Watch it though,
it's a little tougher out there. 


Q: How close is this to the books?
A: Vaguely. Some quests are easy if you've read the books. Generally, it
works off of the books and goes from there. The thing that is consistent is
that it's all pretty goofy. In some cases a deadly goofy, but still goofy.
Other MUD's are much more serious. Not this one.


Q: What if I don't like it here?
A: You don't have to stay. Thanks for giving it a whirl.


Q: What if I do like it here. How long till I become a regular?
A: Forever. The game never ends and there are new quests being added all the
time. You'll know that you're getting good when your name appears on the top
ten list in your guild.


Q: Who are you anyway?
A: I'm the letter A. :)

Q: I am laughing so hard. What was that thing after the sentence?
A: Lighten up. That was a smiley face (turn your head sideways) that meant
that I was saying that in jest. You use those when you talk to people
because that the only way to get across body language.


Q: Who are you really?
A: Turtle. Your name tells people a lot about how you want to be thought as.
A name like Flatulence will not be treated seriously. Yes, I know that this
is supposed to have a light mood to the place, but were still human. It's
tough to ever listen sincerely to Flatulence. See what I mean? I mean, when
Flatulence enters the room, people are going to be naturally turned off.
Also keep in mind that when people talk to you they have to type your name,
so something like Qmartisimia will be kind of annoying to type. Of course, a
real name, like Bob, is kinda dull. Don't try to be clever either. People
will laugh the first time. But a in months that follow, it'll get old. Just
remember this is the only name you'll get.


Q: Do you have any suggestions?
A: Flatulence.


Q: When do I get good enough to be a creator?
A: The real question is do you want to?


Q: Okay, do I want to?
A: Glad you asked. Creators are a far cry from players. As a player, you
have the challenge of exploring and reaching new goals. As a creator, you
can do anything and get anything. Not much challenge in gaming terms. A
reason to become a creator is if you were the always the Dungeon Master. You
like to create the challenges and you know how to program. Once you become
one, the game will never be the same because you've seen all the secrets.
You have to be ready to work really, helping people and answering questions.
It's not all fun and games.


Q: So how do I become one?
A: Apply with a creator when you see one around.
